Ignorance is Bliss
by superyuui
Summary: HIATUS FOREVER Yoh is cheating on Anna with Hao, and the rest of the gang predict huge consequences. Now, if only Horo didn't pick the other short straw... rating T, may go up for language and a possibe lemon. HoroRen centred.
1. Zoom Shots

**Fuller summary: the gang find out about the new relationship between Hao and Yoh and predict huge consequences. With Anna's help, they cook up a plan to both make Yoh and Hao come clean and teach them a lesson. Unfortunately for Horo and Ren, this plan means that they have to pretend to date each other…

* * *

**

Ren looked down onto the dark street, his unblinking gaze obscured by heavy rain lashing against the window.

He let his stare flick to the front of the classroom for a few moments, before getting bored and returning his golden eyes to the abandoned darkness outside.

He watched as his warm breath misted against the panes before it recoiled slowly to once again show the dreary weather of a winter's Tokyo.

Ren absently began writing into the condensation, not really caring if the teacher noticed.

But really, if the poor woman had not yet noticed that every one of her students was either asleep, on their cell phones or flirting at Hao, she wasn't going to notice one Chinese kid with purple spiky hair writing on the window in Mandarin.

Ren honestly didn't think that she knew that she had been teaching Science in a second year English lesson for the past month either.

He sighed quietly.

Substitute teachers, eh?

* * *

After what felt like an eternity of doodling onto his desk, Ren cheered inwardly at the sound of the bell. 

His joy flew away from him like an uncaged bird, however, when he realised that it was lunch time.

Lunch time on a rainy day meant eating in the noisy, crowded cafeteria.

So, as always, Ren and Hao secured the table whilst Horo, Yoh and Manta gathered the food.

This method always worked well, partly because Horo was strangely good at carrying trays, partly because Hao was very good at getting any group of girls to give them their table and partly because Ren was good at being too damn stubborn to let anyone else have the table once it was secured.

When food was brought back to the table, Hao and Ren stared at their trays with mouths agape and eyes twitching, before pushing the food away from them for fear of nuclear waste content levels.

Yoh spooned some sludge up and held it at eye level, before letting it splash back onto his plate, causing small splodges to fly everywhere.

Hao glared at his twin and wiped his sleeve on him, before spooning up some of his own lunch and flicking it at Yoh, who ducked.

Ren's eyes widened considerably when he felt something splat into the back of his head.

He quickly attacked himself with paper napkins until most of whatever someone had hit him with had come off, before turning around to face Hao, who had gone pale and was grinning sheepishly at Ren, but quickly moved when Ren threw his entire plate at him, which flew on to hit the wall and fall onto the floor, sludge side down.

Unfortunately Horo, who was walking back from the serving area with a cup of juice, didn't see the plate until he had stepped onto it, causing the plate to slide forward, taking Horo's foot from beneath him, making him spill his juice over a nearby cheerleader and fall flat onto his back.

The juice-stained cheerleader, after shouting "NON!" for all the world to hear, promptly tipped her strawberry milkshake all over Horo's head.

Ren, seeing this, took Hao's tray (Hao had since wandered away somewhere), put it half off the table and stamped his foot down on the other side, thus catapulting Hao's plate across the lunch hall.

Ren quickly ducked under the table as balls of sludge flew his way, grabbed Horo by the ankle and dragged him under with him.

"Aahh!! Shit, dude! It's in my eyes!" Horo shrieked, rubbing his eyes furiously.

Ren sighed before handing Horo a clean napkin and dodging a very well aimed sludge ball.

Hao jumped onto the table that Ren and Horo were taking refuge under, before shouting "FOOD-FIIIIIIIGHT!" at the top of his lungs and diving under the table with them.

* * *

"Ow! Watch it, Usui!" Ren growled 

"Not my fault! It's stuck like gum!" Horo retorted

Ren muttered to himself and glared hard at his reflection.

They had all safely crawled away from the food fight, and now Horo and Ren were in the boys' bathroom to get the gunk off of themselves.

Horo sighed.

"Ren, we might have to cut it all off."

Ren might have overreacted and told Horo to go and get run over, had he not caught the other shaman's devilish smirk in the mirror.

Ren rolled his eyes.

"Just keep cleaning, Ainu baka." Ren ordered.

"Don't have to. You're done," Horo replied, walking to another mirror and pulling a face, "Like my headband." He untied the previously white strip of material and pulled it off of his head. Remnants of the strawberry milkshake were caked into places where the fabric had been folded, the rest of the headband had also been tinted pink.

Horo's face twisted in disgust and he threw the tainted headband into the nearest trash can.

Ren watched with catlike curiosity while Horo washed dried flakes of milkshake off of his forehead. He couldn't help but notice how… different Horo looked without a headband on… he looked almost older, more mature.

Ren shook his head. As if Horo could ever look mature.

Horo suddenly let out a sound that was a strange mix of a growl and a sigh.

"I will be happy if I never see a strawberry milkshake again for the rest of my LIFE," Horo mumbled, pulling at his knotted hair, "It won't wash out! My hair will go purple!"

"What's wrong with purple?" Ren growled.

Horo muttered something about blue being manlier (at which Ren felt like stabbing him for)

"Rennnnnnnn, help meeeeeee!" Horo whinged. Ren rolled his eyes.

"Come here, fool."

Horo sighed happily and closed his eyes. Ren was being surprisingly gentle, for some reason. Horo remembered trying to get all of the dirt off of his scalp that time they played with the spirits of Goblin Soccer. It felt like Ren was trying to pull all of Horo's hair out on that occasion.

* * *

"Okay, class. Today we will be focusing, our cameras that is," The teacher stopped for a moment to laugh at her own joke before continuing, "Today we will be focusing on zoom shots and lighting. Now, get into your pairs from last lesson and set up your areas." 

Horo and Yoh had been paired together, meaning that Horo had to do all of the work most of the time.

Horo reached up to adjust the lighting when somebody calling his name across the room startled him and he spun around, knocking the light so that it was now shining right into the back of his head.

"Horo!" Hao shouted, "Do you have a zoom lens I can borrow? One that can fit my Canon?"

Horo sighed and told Yoh to give his brother the lens while he readjusted the lamp.

As they had nothing else, Horo whipped the headphones from Yoh's head and set them on the table before taking a few quick snaps at different angles.

Being Horo, he was quickly getting bored and decided to walk over and see if Hao had broken his lens yet.

Seeing Horo coming, Ren switched his camera back to capture mode and quickly stood with his lens only a few inches away from his object: Bason's memorial tablet.

"Ren, one: we are working on zoom, two: you are so close to that tablet that it must be out of focus." Horo pointed out.

"Close-ups are a type of zoom, and not if I use the Macro. Now flit off somewhere else, will you?" Ren replied without so much as looking up, not noticing the sudden rush of heat to his cheeks.

Horo ignored Ren completely and wandered over to Hao (but not without jogging Ren on the way), to see the flame shaman doing what he did best… melting things.

Luckily for Horo and his Y5,000 lens, Hao's victim was a cherry-scented candle.

"You do realise that our teacher won't give you extra marks if the candle is melted." Horo commented

"Yeah, well. She said to use something that either conveys our personality or our past. I'm hot and as we both know, I played with fire quite a bit during the tournament." Hao smirked.

Horo sighed.

"Yoh's headphones don't really show my personality_ or _my past… I need something more… _me_."

"You could always get Kororo to whip up an ice sculpture," Hao shrugged, "Ice is 'you', isn't it?"

Horo shook his head.

"Hey, at least we have three more weeks, eh?" Hao concluded.


	2. Made in China

Horo rubbed his head with a deep sigh and looked around his room again.

Snowboard? No…

Ikupasi? No…

He growled quietly and folded his arms.

Who knew he could get so frustrated over some photography project.

Suddenly remembering plans he had made, he picked up the phone and dialled for Funbari Onsen.

"Moshi moshi?"

"Hey, Yoh. What time were we going again?"

"Eto… about 4:30? I think that's what we decided on, but I'm not totally sure… Check with Ren or Manta or something."

"Sure, I'll call back and let you know." Horo replied, twiddling the phone cord between his fingers.

"Sankyuu. Ja."

"Jaa."

Horo replaced the phone in its holder and started to dial Manta's number, when he remembered that the small shaman was at cram school and wouldn't be home for another half an hour at least.

He sighed as he realised that he had to call Ren during his training hours. The pointy-headed Chinese boy would NOT be best pleased.

Horo lifted the phone from its cradle and paused, unable to recall Ren's number when he realised that he simply hadn't learnt it yet.

Pretty shameful, the only things Horo ever learnt were phone numbers and he couldn't even remember one from his inner circle of friends.

He flipped through his address book, which he didn't even know he had, and managed to find Ren's number, looking as if the person who scrawled it in was either walking, laughing or was getting the book dragged away from them at the time.

"What?"

"Heh. Do you greet all of your callers that way or am I special?" Horo grinned.

Ren 'humph'ed down the phone at Horo, before verbally stabbing him into telling him what he was calling for.

"Well, I couldn't remember what time we were going today… So I called Yoh and he wasn't sure either, so I nearly called Manta, but he's at cram school, so the only other choice was you." Horo shrugged, though Ren obviously couldn't see him.

"We decided 6:30, moron. It's always 6:30. Now can I get back to my training or have you forgotten how to tie your laces?" Ren sneered.

"Bye, Ren." Horo huffed before hanging up.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

"What's the difference between Chocolove and a coconut?" Yoh grinned.

The five of them were lying on top of monument hill, watching the stars and listening to the spirits bustling around below them.

"Coconuts are funnier." Horo answered simply, bringing a few chuckles from the others.

"Nope," Yoh replied; "One is thick and hairy, and the other is the coconut."

Silence.

"I liked Horo's one better." Manta laughed.

"I got one, I got one" Horo grinned, "What's the difference between Ren and a pineapple?"

"Definitely NOT the spikes." Hao interrupted, receiving a death glare from the Chinese boy next to him.

"Heh, almost. Pineapples grow." Horo finished.

Ren growled.

"What's the difference between Horo and the Yeti?" Ren asked, soon after giving them the answer of; "The Yeti has a higher IQ."

Yoh and Manta were practically rolling around laughing, while Ren just smirked at Horo, who glared back and turned away with folded arms.

Ren rolled his eyes and put his hands behind his head.

"Useful piece of advice: don't dish it if you can't take it, Horo." Ren mumbled, before closing his eyes and yawning slightly.

Horo, being completely unable to hold a grudge for any amount of time, noticed this and suggested that they call it a night.

Yoh and Manta stopped giggling enough to nod in agreement.

They were all at the entrance to the cemetery, when Horo noticed that they were one man short.

"You guys just go on. I'll get him." Horo smiled, turning back.

Horo found Ren exactly where they had left him, none of them having realised that the youngest shaman had fallen asleep.

Horo smiled down at his sleeping form, before gently shaking him awake.

Ren opened one eye lazily and yawned widely, before mumbling something Chinese-sounding and closing his eye again.

"Ren, don't go back to sleep!" Horo whined, poking Ren in the shoulder.

Horo sighed when he realised that Ren wasn't going to get up any time soon, and lifted the smaller boy onto his back.

"Good thing you're light." Horo muttered.

Ren made a humming noise and tightened his arms around Horo, catching the Ainu off guard.

Horo turned his head, and saw with relief that Ren was still fast asleep. Horo shook his head and smiled slightly, before setting off back home.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Ren sat up on his futon, his sleepy and unfocused eyes opening and shutting again. He let out a wide yawn and stretched his arms above his head.

He opened his eyes again, blinking them out of their haze, rubbing the remaining sleep away from them.

In the dim morning light, Ren could make out his dresser on the other side of the room, with a wall height mirror hanging next to it. He saw his uniform hanging up on the door, and as if this all wasn't enough to convince him that this was, in fact, his room, he could see Houraiken on a rack on the wall with his oracle bell resting on top.

Ren kicked the sheets off of himself, making a mental note to right them later. He stood, pulling his yukata tighter around himself for warmth, vaguely remembering Horo waking him to change into it.

Roughly fifteen minutes later, Ren padded out of the bathroom with frustration etched into his face. Running out of lenses meant wearing his glasses, which meant searching around the apartment blindly until he came across them, which wasn't really something anyone would feel like doing at 7 am.

He growled slightly and went into the kitchen, only slightly surprised when he felt something squishy underfoot.

The said underfoot squishy let out a 'mmrpf' of complaint until Ren moved his foot.

Horo stood up, and because he was in Ren's sight range, Ren noticed the sentence 'anihC ni edaM' printed into the Ainu's cheek.

"Dude," Horo complained, "Where did you get those slippers?"

Ren said nothing, but pointed towards what he remembered to be in the general direction of the mirror.

"Made in China." Horo read, grimacing, "Nice."

"Breakfast?" Ren offered after a lengthy roll of the eyes. Taking the blurry shape of Horo's head bobbing up and down as a 'yes', Ren set about making the first meal of the day.

Ren squinted over at the clock, unable to make out what time it was.

"7:10." Horo said, noticing Ren's trouble before chuckling, "I didn't really believe that you wore lenses. I thought you had 20:20 vision."

Ren remained silent, not letting the toast burn in the pan.

"I wouldn't of known if you hadn't mumbled 'lenses' at me last night. Kamui, it was such a pain getting them out… Remind me to wake you up next time." Horo laughed.

Ren allowed a smirk, before giving Horo a slice of toast and munching into his own.

"Want me to look for your glasses?" Horo offered, clearing their plates away.

Ren dived into the fridge for a bottle of milk, before sighing.

"No need." He replied, returning from the fridge with both the milk and his glasses.

Horo raised an eyebrow

"In the fridge?"

Ren nodded, cleaning his glasses on his shirt.

"…I don't even wanna know." Horo decided, going towards Ren's bedroom, "Mind if I use the shower?"

"Whatever." Ren replied, putting the black-framed glasses on, "We have about an hour before school, so that means leaving in about fifteen minutes," he added, after quickly consulting the clock.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

"These are too big for me, but you can borrow them for today." Ren said, handing Horo his spare uniform.

Horo, also in a spare yukata, made a face.

"Are you saying I'm fat?" The Ainu asked sceptically.

Ren raised an eyebrow at the ice shaman.

"Do you realise how queer you just sounded?"

Horo glared at Ren, before disappearing back into the bathroom with the uniform.

Ren checked his watch.

"5 minutes, Horo!"

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

**Wow, chapter 2 took me forever to do X.X**

**In my defence, huge textiles project due in last week. Being the procrastinator that I am, I only started it like…. Last Friday night.**

**Please review!!! If I get more reviews, I may be inspired to write quicker winks**

**Japanese - English**

**Sankyuu - Thank you**

**Ja / Jaa - Bye**

**Futon - japanese beds (on the floor)**

**Yukata - a kimono usually made out of cotton for things like summer, sleeping in and after being in the shower/hot spring... kinda like a dressing gown / bath robe**

**Kamui - Ainu language for gods**


	3. Bar Stools

"HORO!! WE HAVE TO LEAVE _NOW_!"

Horo came running in, before slipping over a wet patch on the floor and sliding through the hall and into the kitchen, slamming into the island and bar stools.

Ren stopped tying his laces and looked at the doorframe that lead to the kitchen, unable to see Horo from his angle.

"..I'm okay!" Horo's voice floated over to him, and Ren sweat dropped in annoyance.

Ren stood, slinging his bag over his shoulders.

"It's an 8 minute walk to the train station from here AND WE HAVE 2 MINUTES UNTIL IT LEAVES!!" Ren yelled as Horo walked out of the kitchen, rubbing his sore head.

"Don't worry, Ren" Horo said, moving his arms like that annoying guy from e-sure does when he's all 'calm down dear', "We'll get to school on time."

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Surprisingly enough, they did make it to school on time. They actually made it to school a lot earlier than if they had taken the train, which they did end up missing in the end.

After sprinting as fast as they could to the train station, they were still too late. So Horo, after a quick jog back to Ren's house, used his snowboard to get them to school in no time at all.

"You could have gone slower." Ren grumbled, running his fingers through his now messed up hair, trying to get it to untangle.

"Hey guys, I need to talk to you…"

Horo and Ren looked down to see Manta looking at them nervously, wringing his hands.

"Did you piss off another yakuza, Manta?" Horo joked and Ren rolled his eyes.

"No… But we need a place for everyone to meet… everyone, minus Hao and Yoh that is… After school…"

"Sure, Manta. Ren's apartment is huge!" Horo offered, ignoring Ren's squeak of protest.

"Wow! That'd be great!... Da… Daijoubu ka.. Ren?"

"Not exactly like I can retract the offer anymore, is it?" Ren muttered, glaring hard at Horo.

"Cool! So we'll all come over after school, about 5-ish, but don't let Hao and Yoh know!" Manta replied, murmuring the last bit and running off.

"What was that about?" Horo asked, before realising that he was talking to himself and that the bell had just gone.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

About seven hours later, Ren once again found himself staring out of the window of his English/science class, bored out of his skull.

The doodles that he'd left on his desk the day before had been washed off, but you could still see the dents in the wood if you looked hard enough.

He cringed as the whiteboard pen squeaked horribly, before relaxing and rubbing his temples.

God, he would have probably given his right arm to be out of that room right there and then.

Actually, he was rather fond of his right arm… maybe his left arm. Freedom wasn't as important as his right arm. He could write with his right arm. He could make tea with his right arm. He could eat with his right arm. He could strangle the teacher with his right arm.

Great. He was rambling to himself in second person.

If he wasn't in a room full of people who would judge him, he would have banged his head on his desk several times.

When the bell went, Ren was the first out of the room, which was quite a feat considering that he was furthest away from the door. He kept running until he got to his locker, before viciously throwing his English book inside as if the thing would poison him.

He shuffled around inside his locker for a bit, before he found that he didn't have his wallet with him. He cursed under his breath as he realised that he wouldn't be able to get home, and would have to get Horo to take him.

He slammed his locker shut and walked towards where he knew the Ainu would be.

"Hi, Renny!" Horo chirped

"Don't call me that." Ren snapped, "Thanks to you, I neither have my train pass or my wallet, so I'll be riding on that death trap you call a snowboard with you again."

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

After stopping at Horo's apartment so that the Ainu could change quickly, Ren unlocked his front door and stormed in, kicking his shoes off, wriggling out of his coat and abandoning his bag by the door before angrily grabbing the nearest hairbrush and running it through his windswept hair, giving out a loud curse for each knot he came across, however small it was.

"I wonder what Manta wants us all over for." Horo commented from the living room.

Ren resisted his strong urge to just run into the living room and stab Horo with the hairbrush, instead slowly counting to ten in his head.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

"Saa… The reason I wanted us all here…" Manta began, scratching his head, "As Anna and I know, there is something going on between Hao and Yoh, which seems to be more than just 'brotherly love'… you could say—"

"Yoh is cheating on me with Hao." Anna interrupted, "Manta and I have come up with a plan that will both expose them and get them to admit that they are in the wrong." She finished above all of the gasps and whispers before Manta took charge again.

"Here's how it goes…"

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

**Whut, chap 3 OwO!**

**Hehe, I left you with a kind-of cliffy n.n;; gomen ne!**

**The chapters will start getting longer from here, I realise that they are a bit short (only like 1300 words -.-)**

**Saa – well**

**Daijoubu ka – is it okay?**

**Remember: reviews make us all feel special…. Click the blue button, poyo!!**


	4. Aaaand

Ren cursed to himself repeatedly as he walked to the train station the next day. What a crock.

He wasn't going to go along with it.

No chance in hell.

Less chance in hell than a snowball.

Make that a raindrop. Yeah, a raindrop.

"Ren!"

Ren's eye twitched. Murder seemed like a good idea right now. Or suicide… Maybe both.

"Hey, Ren! Wait up!"

Murder.

Definitely murder.

"OI! REN!"

"WHAT THE HELL DO YOU WANT, AINU?!" Ren screamed in Horo's face when he span around, a vein throbbing in his temple.

Horo nearly doubled back, before righting himself

"Seeing as we're dating now—"

"WE ARE NOT DATING NOW!"

"But, dude—"

"I AM NOT 'DUDE'!"

Horo sighed.

"Fine, Ren. Being together is part of the plan."

"FUCK THE PLAN!" Ren yelled before Horo jumped at him and covered Ren's mouth with his hand.

"Look," Horo said, whispering harshly into Ren's ear, "I'm not too hot about it either. But it's for Yoh. That, and Anna would kill us if we didn't go along with it!"

Ren slapped Horo away and continued towards school, cursing again.

"It's not my fault you picked the short straw. It's not my fault I picked the other short straw. But the whole thing falls apart without us." Horo stated, running to walk next to Ren, "Come on, Ren. Face it like a man instead of a spoiled child!"

Ren spun round.

"In any other circumstances, I would. But excuse me if I'm a bit upset that my sexual preference has been flipped around for the sake of someone who seems to be constantly on crack!" Ren snapped.

"Look, it's just for two weeks. And it's not like we'll have to… ugh, _kiss_ or anything." Horo reasoned.

Another vein popped in Ren's temple as he growled.

"Argh!! Fine!" He replied, obviously furious about the pair-up, "But NO kissing!"

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Yoh got quite a shock when he turned the corner in the hallway at school. Horo and Ren were…. Hugging…. Not only that, but Horo has his arms around Ren's waist while Ren's arms were around Horo's neck loosely. As if that weren't enough, the two were smiling and whispering in each other's ears.

Thoroughly spooked out, (no pun intended) Yoh backtracked around the corner and walked in the opposite direction.

"_Is he gone yet?" _Ren murmured, keeping the fake smile plastered onto his face.

He felt Horo move his head, obviously to see if their laid-back brunette friend was anywhere in sight.

"_Yeah…"_

Not less than one second had passed before both boys pushed the other away, Ren with a scowl and Horo looking embarrassed.

Thank God that nobody else was in the hallway.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Yoh was sat at his desk, watching curiously as Horo and Ren paused in the doorway, hands linked, Ren gazing into Horo's eyes.

To Yoh and everyone else in the room (if any of them happened to care at that moment) this was a gaze that promised love and caring.

To Horo, this was a gaze that promised death as soon as school ended.

Ren and Horo unlinked their hands and both walked away from each other. Ren made sure he was out of sight before doubling over in the hallway cringing and Horo walked to his desk, keeping up his façade of happiness and calm, when inside all he wanted to do was beat Yoh up.

Horo finally found his desk and, making sure that Yoh wasn't looking, collapsed into his seat and let out the long, angry breath he'd been holding.

Horo looked up as a tiny bit of crumpled up paper hit his head.

Yoh, 3 seats in front and 4 to the right, grinned at Horo and indicated for him to open it.

Horo read Yoh's note quickly, new anger flaring up inside.

'_You and Ren seem pretty cosy recently. Anything you wanna tell me?'_

Horo growled silently before stealing a biro off of the girl next to him (she wasn't going to notice) and scribbling back his reply, before throwing it at Yoh, who caught it and turned to face the front quickly.

'_Oh, you know. Things happened.'_

Yoh grinned and wrote 'what kind of things' before throwing the note back and to the left.

Horo: Well… We got into an argument yesterday

Yoh: Aaaand?

Horo: We both said things that we didn't mean…

Yoh: Aaaand?

Horo: We made up

Yoh: Aaaand?

Pirika: They're dating, baka! Now stop throwing notes before sensei catches you both!

Yoh snickered, but quickly stopped when their teacher turned around.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

"Hey, Ren." Hao greeted, sitting next to the Chinese boy. Ren gave a small nod, his eyes trained onto his work.

Hao opened his mouth to say something, but was interrupted by their teacher walking into the room.

"Name one thing we know about Taoism. Kenta."

"They believe in…. like… balance and all that… ya know."

"…… Okay. Who can tell me one proverb? … Aki."

"'The journey is the reward.'"

"Good choice. Ren, name one thing Taoists can't do up to one week before writing talismans."

Ren rolled his eyes.

"Have sex," he answered boldly, ignoring the giggles that began to circle the room.

Hao smirked and continued his conversation with Ren, their teacher now completely flustered.

"So… Manta tells me that Horo woke up with balls this morning."

Ren raised an eyebrow.

"How so?"

"You know, he _finally _told you how he feels. I swear, any longer and I'd have made flyers." Hao laughed, not catching Ren's growl, "Yoh also caught you having a 'moment' with Horo this morning. Care to elaborate?"

Ren opened his mouth to retaliate, but Hao smirked and returned to his own seat on the other side of the room.

Ren returned to his work and grumbled something about being surrounded by idiots.

As the lesson dragged on, Ren decided that he needn't concentrate and thus let his mind flit to things with no relevance to anything at all while he picked at a loose thread on his cuffs.

'_I should get this fixed… or I could get a new shirt… damn it, my glasses are annoying… Note to self: order more lenses.' _ Ren thought aimlessly, though thoughts of his black-rimmed glasses could only lead to the inevitable, and Ren was soon making up his own little Taoist curse to inflict on a certain blue-haired Ainu.

Ren blinked and suddenly, the most malicious and cunning grin broke out on his face like acne.

He knew how to get Horo back, and it'd be the _perfect _punishment.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Horo dove into his apartment, before slamming the door shut, locking it and putting a chair against it.

Horo suddenly stopped moving, before gulping down some air and slumping against the wall, head hidden in his hands.

This _had _to be a nightmare. It just _had _to be. There was no…

But wait…

Surely, that if he could realise that this was a nightmare, then it wasn't really a nightmare?

Surely, it could only be a nightmare if he didn't realise it…

Surely… he would have woken up by now if he had realised a nightmare.

But no… He had realised… and he hadn't woken up.

He took another deep breath, more to stop shaking than to supply oxygen to his body.

He stood and walked into his bathroom, deciding to lock the door and close the blinds, just in case.

Horo, slowly and quietly, peeled his clothes off of himself, flinching at every foreign noise, and stepped into the shower.

He stared at the deep blue wall tiles as the cool water ran over him, totally lost in his confused thoughts.

When Horo found himself, he had curled into an upright ball at the bottom of the shower with his head against the tiles. He blinked slowly and stood up, switching the shower off.

He shivered and dried himself, before donning himself in grey joggers and a black shirt and walked into his living room, his hair dripping onto his shoulders, and curled up in the corner of his sofa.

His thoughts were everywhere. He didn't know what to make of the situation at all.

He let out a sigh and closed his eyes, scared more than anything.

He was jerked out of his reverie as his hybrid kitten pulled herself onto the sofa and rubbed against him, before mewing softly and climbing into his lap. He smiled and scratched behind her ears.

"You know. I should really give you a name, little one." Horo almost cooed to her as she purred and nuzzled his fingers.

"How about… Hure-so?" Horo suggested, chuckling as the kitten flicked her tail in annoyance, "I guess not… Unahure? Hureuna?" he questioned, and was pretty sure that the small kitten had glared at him.

"Heh. You don't like the word 'hure', ne? … I could take the Pirika approach and call you something like Merumo, but that's way too girly for both of us," Horo smiled, and clicked his fingers. "How about I call you Kiyay?"

Horo beamed as the small kitten licked his fingers and purred louder.

"Kiyay it is!"

Horo sat petting Kiyay for quite some time before his mind wondered back to the…. Incident.

He stopped and frowned, letting the links slowly fit into place.

'_Okay… Scenario 1 is that Ren has finally cracked, Scenario 2 is that Ren is playing along and Scenario 3 is… Scenario 3 doesn't bare thinking about.' _Horo grimaced, _'We're all going to the Asakura's tonight anyway. I can ask him then…'_

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

**Phew! Sorry for the slow update, but I really wanted to write more (I was going to stop after Hao goes back to his seat, but I persisted and got about 670 more words :D)**

**I tried not to indicate too harshly what had mucked Horo up, but I couldn't help the bit at the end. –wanted to keep it a surprise-**

**Ainu – English**

**Hure-So – Red Waterfall**

**Unahure / Hureuna Ash Red / Red Ash**

**Merumo Small Light**

**Kiyay: Sunlight, Sunrays etc**

**If anybody does history and has seen the video, they will know that 'back and to the left' connotates JFK's assassination. I had to add that in because the phrase is circling my school and it has influenced me u.uU**


	5. I Know You Too Well

"Na, Ren… I know we haven't really been the greatest of friends and that this plan has sprung us into something we both really didn't want, but I think that we should hang out more after school. Partly because it'd look more realistic to Yoh, and partly so that we won't feel awkward while we're acting… So, what do you think?" Horo grinned, turning to face Kiyay, who was curled up at the foot of Horo's bed. Kiyay blinked and yawned, showing off her set of baby-teeth before curling tighter and falling asleep.

"Nice to know I have your support." Horo commented dryly.

Horo sighed and faced his mirror again.

Seeing his only other option, Horo took a steadying breath and called Ren.

"Moshi moshi."

Horo froze slightly, before taking another breath and speaking in what he hoped was his normal voice.

"Hey, Ren. I was thinking, for this thing at Yoh's that is… that we should like… dress similar… Just to add to the… impression… You know…"

Ren was silent for a few moments.

"Okay. Pick a colour."

Horo grinned.

**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -**

Ren grimaced at his reflection.

"This is moronic…" he muttered, before speaking in a louder voice, "Bason, I need your opinion."

"Bocchama?" Bason appeared out of thin air in his flame ball mode.

Ren gestured to his own reflection.

"Bocchama looks different, but not too different to be uncanny." Bason replied and Ren scowled.

"I look ridiculous."

"Nonsense. You look excellent, as usual." Bason argued.

"I look like a clown."

"…"

Ren glared at his ghost, who yelped and retreated into nothingness.

Ren 'tsk'ed and glared at his reflection one last time before leaving his room.

**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -**

"How about this one?" Horo asked, holding up a pair of jeans.

Kiyay blinked, which Horo had taken to be her way of shrugging, seeing as cats usually didn't need to blink much.

"Not very decisive, are we?" Horo teased and Kiyay glared at him.

Horo jumped out of his skin at the sound of his doorbell and glanced at his wall clock.

"Kuso!" Horo hissed, "Be right there!" he yelled, running into the hall.

When the door opened, Ren raised an eyebrow at Horo, who was wearing tatty grey trousers and no shirt.

"I know," Horo groaned, "But I don't have anything red other than a really old pair of boxers!"

Ren rolled his eyes and held up a carrier bag that he'd brought with him.

"Horokeu, I think I know you too well."

**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -**

"How about this?" Horo turned around, holding a small leather shirt.

"Too tight to look normal on you." Ren commented from the foot of the bed, absently stroking Kiyay, who had crawled into his lap as soon as he sat himself down.

"Kiyay?" Horo asked, demanding a second opinion.

The hybrid merely mewed at him and continued purring, her yellow eyes closed in contentment.

Ren smirked at Horo, who had turned back to his wardrobe and was muttering things about conspiracies and how he should have named her Merumo after all.

The phone rang, and Horo answered.

"Hey, Yoh. Yeah, spanner in the works over here. Erm…" Horo covered the receiver with his hand and spoke to Ren, who was now at his wardrobe searching through it. "How long should we be?"

"We're getting the next train." Ren replied without even turning around.

Horo relayed this to Yoh, who asked them to not be any later.

Horo hung up and stared at Ren, who had handed him a plain black shirt.

"Bleh! Ren, this was my training shirt!" Horo whined.

"You can barely recognise it," Ren shrugged and turned to Bason, who was being swiped at by Kiyay. "Bason?"

"Bocchama Horokeu would look very himself." Bason agreed, and dodged another swipe.

"Then it's settled." Ren smirked.

"You don't exactly look normal, Ren. Since when were you into tight black trousers and not those poofy ones of yours?"

Ren didn't answer, but instead told Horo to hurry up and that he'd feed Kiyay for him.

**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -**

Horo stepped out of his bedroom and Ren looked up from the couch, where he was lounging with a full and sleepy Kiyay.

"See? I was right." Ren leered, "I knew you'd fit those baggy jeans of mine. Good thing they're red, too."

Horo nodded, still a bit wary of being near Ren.

'_But,'_ Horo reasoned, _'he's acting normal, so maybe he wasn't totally himself earlier… yeah, that's it!'_

Ren smiled and linked his arm with Horo's, who flinched slightly.

"Ready to go, _ai?_" Ren asked, putting hard emphasis on the last word.

"I sure would, _koi." _Horo replied, gritting his teeth.

They walked to the train station in silence, though tension was thick in the air.

Ren's golden eyes scanned the timetable which was posted to the wall, looking for the time of the last train and calculating when he'd have to leave the Asakura house.

"Erm… Ren…"

Ren 'hmm?'ed and his eyes flicked over to Horo, who was rubbing the back of his neck nervously.

"Well… you know what happened at school today? … That was just for appearances, right?"

-+flashback+-

_Ren pushed Horo against the desk and stood as close to him as possible without his upper body actually touching him, their faces mere centimetres apart._

_Ren smirked seductively at Horo, who was too rattled to move or react._

"_Let's make this more obvious… shall we?" Ren murmured before pressing his lips against Horo's…_

-+end flashback+-

Ren blinked, trying hard to keep his poker face. He lowered his head slightly, just enough so that his bangs would cover his eyes and took a few steps toward Horo, who flinched but didn't retreat.

Ren pushed him against a pole, much in a similar fashion as that afternoon, and raised his head to look right into the terrified Ainu's eyes.

Ren broke eye contact to look at the zip of Horo's coat. He smirked slightly and pulled the zip down, showing off a bit of Horo's collarbone. Ren brushed his cold nose against Horo's neck and quietly told him "Maybe it was… maybe it wasn't…" before gently touching his lips to Horo's skin.

Horo shivered.

"Hey! There's the train!"

Ren moved away, his poker face back in play, and turned around before grimacing and rubbing his mouth with a tissue.

The rest of the trip was silent, both of them staring out of the window at the passing streets of Funbari.

"Still not got any lenses, Ren?"

Ren blinked and suddenly hit his head against his hand.

Horo sweatdropped, "Something I said?"

"I forgot to order the new lenses." Ren muttered, "And I left my phone at home."

"Just order them tomorrow or something." Horo suggested, trying to stop Ren from hitting his head on nearby objects, "Anyway, I think the glasses make you look h -- er… cool." Horo finished lamely.

**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -**

When they were just in front of the En Inn, Ren stuck his arm out in front of Horo to stop him from walking further.

"We can't just walk in. It doesn't make us look together." Ren said when Horo gave him a questioning look.

Horo nodded and was about to hold Ren's hand when he felt something move in his pocket.

"Ren…"

"What now?"

Horo gulped. "There's something in my pocket."

Ren blinked a few times.

"Something _alive_." Horo added, his voice shaking.

Ren reached into Horo's pocket and rolled his eyes, taking out a very ruffled Kiyay.

"What the?! Cheeky thing must've jumped into my pocket before we left!"

"No, really?" Ren muttered sarcastically, smoothing out the kitten's white and red fur. "Not much we can do about it now, you'll just have to make sure you don't forget her."

"Yeah… Anyway. I'll hold miss Great Escape and you can… holdmyarmorsomething."

"What?"

"You know what I said!" Horo snapped, taking Kiyay from Ren.

Ren smirked and put his arm through Horo's, and they continued into the Funbari Onsen.

"Hey, glad you made it in the end" Yoh grinned, letting Horo and Ren in.

"Yeah, sorry, but there's an extra mouth to feed." Horo indicated Kiyay, "The little rascal stowed away in my pocket."

After removing his boots, Ren took Kiyay from Horo so that the ice shaman could remove his own footwear and went into the living room.

As soon as she was put down, the curious kitten started scampering around and sniffing the air, sometimes tripping over her own paws.

"That thing better not leave messes on my tatami, or we all know who will be cleaning it up." Anna warned Horo, who had finally struggled out of his vans.

"Nah, she's housetrained. If she starts mewing at you, that's when we need to worry!" Horo laughed, sitting next to Ren, who tried not to twitch in annoyance.

"So… Is it true or was Hao pulling our legs?" Manta started, smiling at Horo and Ren in a way that said 'Go along with it or I won't be afraid to borrow Mosuke's hammer!'

Ren nodded and continued sipping his milk, whereas Horo grinned sheepishly and rubbed behind his head.

"…Well, enough of awkward silences!" Ryu chuckled, "We have dinner to eat!"

The rest of the evening passed quite quickly, and everyone thought that Horo and Ren had been able to convince Yoh that they were really dating.

Ren managed not to murder anything, even when he had to do everything with Horo, including sleep next to.

Annoyances aside, the purple headed boy soon fell asleep with everybody else.

Everybody else, that is, minus Horo, who's mind was still swimming with thoughts about how strange Ren was acting, and even worse, how he himself was reacting.

He was just plain shocked when Ren had kissed him at school. He was nervous when Ren kissed him again at the train station. But, he was totally unprepared for the strange flutter in the pit of his stomach that occurred when Ren had linked their arms… it was almost as if he… _liked _it!

Horo shook his head. He was just tired, that's all. The flutter was just nerves about whether Yoh would buy into the act. Yeah, that's it. It was just nerves.

The last thing Horo thought before falling asleep that night wasn't too reassuring. He kept repeating to himself that it was just nerves, but in the back of his mind, one phrase was always there to reply.

'_I hope so.'_

**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -**

Ren shivered and drew his coat closer around himself, trying desperately to just ignore the heavy rain still splashing against him.

He had become so numb from the cold that he couldn't even sense Bason anymore. Everything had blurred together. He couldn't hear the roar of the lorries and cars on the roads against the deafening rain. The bright lights of Tokyo were all mixed together in the kaleidoscope his glasses had become.

-flashback-

"_It's still raining?"_

_After spending about 12 hours more than they had intended to at En Inn because of torrential rain, Horo, Manta and Ren had decided to get the last train while they were in the eye of the storm._

_Kiyay safely tucked in Horo's warm pocket, he ducked his head and pulled his hood tighter before setting off at a jog towards his apartment, Manta at his side._

_Ren watched them leave before setting off in the opposite direction, Bason following him in the straightest line he could muster in his drunken state._

_Even though he could not feel the rain hitting his face, Bason quickly sobered up and caught up to his master and started babbling about why they should do that again and what gossip was circling the graveyards and which mortal was the most fun to haunt._

_Ren smirked, only half listening, while the cogs in his brain worked away, devising the next stage of his plan._

"_Chikusho!" Ren hissed, searching his pockets frantically. He groaned and hit his head against the door._

"_Bocchama?"_

"_I think I left my keys at Yoh's… Kuso!" Ren swore, sitting with his back against the wall._

"_Should I go and get Master Horokeu?" Bason questioned, floating at Ren's eye level._

_Ren shook his head, bowing it to stop the rain from irritating him too much. "The storm will be over soon, and it's not like I've never slept outside."_

"_Bocchama…" Bason trailed off._

-end flashback-

Ren looked around himself dazedly. Bason must have gone off, despite Ren's objections.

Oh well. He didn't have the energy to feel angry. He felt his consciousness slipping away from him, but he didn't resist, gladly falling asleep.

**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -**

Horo found Ren exactly where Bason said he was.

The ice shaman got them both back to his apartment in less than three minutes before quickly and unashamedly stripping Ren from his sopping wet clothes, drying him off and putting him into a spare yukata.

Horo put Ren on the couch and covered him in warm, fuzzy blankets before putting the wet clothes into the washer-dryer and boiling the kettle for a cup of hot chocolate.

Horo let out a long breath and plopped into his armchair, instantly falling to sleep, the kettle long forgotten.

**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -**

**Whooo! Chap 5 over:D It was a bit longer than the other chaps, which I'm happy about I'll be making the chapters progressively longer, so chap 6 will be around 3,000 without the A/N**

**Japanese – English**

**Bocchama – **what Bason calls Ren, it translates to 'young master'

**Kuso – **pronounced "kso". Is the Japanese version of 'shit' or 'damn it'

**Ai – **Love. (I meant it in the Mandarin term, because Ren is Chinese, but it means the same thing in Japanese anyway.)

**Koi – **see ai (isn't Chinese, and don't confuse with koi as in koi carp!)

**En Inn / Funbari Onsen – **if you don't know these, then I worry for you. Both are names for where the Asakuras live. En Inn was what the house was called when it was an inn for travellers and Funbari Onsen is what Anna has called it.

**Tatami – **mats that are in traditional Japanese houses. You can guess what they are if you have watched the anime or read the manga (or both), but if you still don't know, then type it into google images or something.

**Chikusho – **like kuso, but stronger (but literally means beast)

**Just to finish off, can we have a few more people reviewing please? Even if it's just to say 'cool fic' or something like that, and a (constructive) flame is appreciated too**


	6. Honey and Lemon

There were only so many things that could get Horo's lazy ass out of bed in the morning.

The list consisted of food, snowboarding and… well… that's about it really.

The Ainu had been awake for over 10 minutes, but because he hadn't moved at all, neither his body nor mind were aware of consciousness.

That soon changed however, when he heard a dry cough emanate from somewhere to his left.

Horo slowly wiggled his toes and twitched his fingers, gently and calmly moving one limb after another to wake his mind up without seeing spots for twenty seconds after.

Horo rubbed his sore eyes and yawned, stretching his legs, arms and back as he did so.

He blinked a few times, before he heard another dry cough, this one sounding a lot more painful.

Horo watched Ren cough for about a minute before his mind even contemplated doing anything about it.

Horo woke Ren and sat him up, trying not to flinch at how bad the coughing sounded. He rubbed Ren's back soothingly until the cough subsided, at which point Ren had exhausted himself and was falling asleep on Horo's shoulder.

Horo put a hand to Ren's forehead, and decided instantly that he had caught a cold, which wasn't really surprising if he had been out in the rain as long as Horo suspected.

Horo filled a bowl with cold water and went on a hunt for a flannel, which he found in one of his cupboards.

After putting the damp flannel on Ren's forehead, Horo stood in the kitchen, racking his brain for some kind of drink or food his mother used to make when he got sick.

He closed his eyes and could almost taste the warm concoction. It was sweet, but had a sour aftertaste to it, and it smelled citrussey, like limes.

After calling Pirika to confirm his guess, Horo set about boiling the kettle and gathering the two other necessary ingredients.

'_Argh. I feel like someone ran me over and then put me in a pond.' _Ren thought, his throat too dry to produce sound. He knew he was at Horo's before he even opened his eyes. He recognised the feeling of the soft sofa underneath him, and whatever was covering had the Ainu foresty scent all over it.

"Horo." Ren tried, but all that came out was a scrappy 'oh' sound. He licked his lips and tried again, this time it came out as a loud croak.

Ren scowled and settled for rapping his knuckles on the coffee table.

Sure enough, Horo's blue head poked out from the kitchen, and instantly a broad grin spread on his face.

"You're awake then. Hang on, I'm making something that might help." he instructed, ducking back into the kitchen.

Dreading to think of what this 'something' might be, Ren yawned and snuggled further under the covers, not surprised to see Kiyay on the floor by his head, blinking her blue eyes at him.

Ren smiled and lifted the kitten onto the sofa with him, letting her nuzzle into him and flop down against him.

Horo came out of the kitchen, carrying a small glass of some light amber liquid mixture.

Ren took the glass from him and took a tentative sniff, before looking at Horo and arching an eyebrow in question.

"It's Honey, Lemon and hot water. My mum used to make it for me and Pirika when we got sick with colds, which was often." Horo smiled, his eyes taking on a faraway look as he got lost in his memories. Horo blinked and smiled again. "Go on, it's not poison, Ren." he chuckled.

Ren, still too drained of energy to argue, started gulping down the strange sweet and sour drink.

"Whoa! Slow down!" Horo laughed, "It works better if you sip it, inhaling it like that wouldn't do anything and I'd have to make you another one."

Ren nodded and sipped it like Horo had told him, and he felt his throat warm up a little.

He smiled, and tested his vocal chords with a "Thanks, Horo."

-------------------------------------------------

Ren grumbled into his borrowed duvet.

Horo had forced him to stay at his instead of going to school, and said Ainu kept flitting around him like some kind of fly that Ren would like nothing more than to SQUISH.

An idea popped into Ren's head and he suppressed a grin.

"Na, Horo," Ren paused to cough, before looking up at the other shaman with as much helplessness as he could muster, "My throat really hurts… There's this medicine you can get just a few blocks away that works a treat, and I'll pay you back when I can get back to my apartment…" Ren trailed off when he saw that Horo had cottoned on.

"So, you want me to go and get you this medicine?"

Ren nodded, coughing again and letting out a small groan when it felt like he'd swallowed the blade of his Kwan Dao.

-------------------------------------------------

Horo squinted at Ren's almost purposefully bad attempt at Japanese before looking up at the signpost he was stood in front of.

According to Ren, though he couldn't remember the exact name of this medicine, he did know that it contained Eucalyptus oils and Menthol, and tasted like honey.

Horo looked back down at the paper in his hands, trying to figure out the vague directions.

He sighed, shrugged and took the nearest turning.

He continued like this for some time, and was now deep into a part of Tokyo he'd never been to before, glad that foreign places didn't scare him.

Much.

Horo sighed in defeat and strode into the nearest shop.

"Hey, can you help me?"

A girl in the shop's uniform turned to face him and gave a forced smile.

'_someone's only in it for the money.' _Horo joked mentally, keeping his face straight.

"I was wondering if you knew where I could find a shop that sells some cough remedy that tastes like honey and has Eucalyptus oils and menthol in it."

The girl smirked and said "Sure", before leading him to the medicine shelf and handing him a small packet.

Horo blinked.

-------------------------------------------------

Horo stepped into his apartment and slammed the door behind him, still letting off a string of curses under his breath.

He shrugged off his coat and pulled his feet from his boots, before rummaging in his coat pocket.

Ready to argue Ren's ears off, Horo strode into his living room and stood in front of the couch where Ren had temporarily set up home.

Horo opened his mouth… and paused.

He blinked, before moving closer to Ren to see his face properly.

Horo smiled, his anger almost completely forgotten. Ren was sleeping, his face completely neutral. It almost seemed wrong, or clichéd, but Horo thought that Ren looked… peaceful… innocent, even.

Still smiling, Horo left Ren to his sleep, but not before leaving the 'medicine' on the coffee table.

-------------------------------------------------

Ren breathed heavily after a particularly nasty wave of coughing washed over him, leaving his throat feeling completely dry and raw. He swallowed and winced as the cutting pain seemed to sting more for a few seconds, before it calmed down a bit into a dull ache that seared with every breath.

He slumped back against a cushion and rubbed his sore eyes. It was about 3am now, and he had woken up roughly an hour ago by his coughing, and hadn't been able to nod off again.

When he was sure that he and his throat were safe for now, Ren looked guiltily at the pack of Soothers that he'd sent Horo all over Tokyo to find. He only wanted to get Horo the Mother Hen out of his hair for a while, and he had even made it blatantly obvious what he was after! He hadn't expected the Ainu to be gone hours and hours for something so basic, and obvious.

It was Horo's fault for being an idiot. Yeah.

So why couldn't he get to sleep again, even though the coughing had subsided?

With a frustrated sigh, Ren kicked the covers off of himself and headed into Horo's kitchen.

It took Ren about 20 seconds to realise that poking the bridge of his nose was not helping his sight in any way, because his glasses were back on the coffee table and not on his face.

Ren made a mental note to order new lenses ASAP, and started shifting around in Horo's medicine cupboard.

He popped a Nytol from its packet and swallowed it with water, before sneaking a glass of milk, figuring that Horo wouldn't mind.

Now back on the couch, Ren waited for the Nytol to kick in so that he could go comatose for at least a few hours.

Realising that if it carried on, he would miss school on Monday, which appealed to him strongly because he wouldn't have to pretend to not hear the rude comments and insults he was getting for being 'gay'. Oh yeah, and he wouldn't have to pretend to like Horo either.

It wasn't that he didn't _like_ Horo, of course he liked Horo, they were friends!

He just didn't like Horo _that _way, and draping himself over Horo for most of his time was getting quite tedious already, after only one school day.

Ren yawned softly and let himself drift off to sleep. He'd muse over it more in the morning.

-------------------------------------------------

Horo let out a sigh.

Yes, he was pitying Ren. The short-tempered, short-sighted, short shaman who had had him running all over Funbari and Shibuya for a pack of cough sweets.

But honestly, if you had spent the last hour listening to your best friend of two years violently hacking up his lungs in the room next to you, you'd feel pity too.

Seeing as he could no longer hear sounds from the other room, Horo decided that Ren had either succeeded incoughing up his lungs, died or fallen asleep.

Horo blinked, and was at his bedroom door in an instant.

Slowly, he cracked it open an inch or two so that he could see Ren over on the couch.

Horo let out a breath he didn't know he was holding. Ren was definitely breathing, his chest was rising and falling every few seconds, as it should be.

Slightly embarrassed, Horo slunk back to bed and fell asleep, safe in the knowledge that his friend had been granted a few hours' peace.

-------------------------------------------------

Ren woke slowly, his head breaking and his throat ablaze.

Okay, maybe that was a bit of an exaggeration, but it really did _hurt! _

He sat up quickly, coughing hard. His vision span, his eyes unfocused and sore.

He didn't notice Kiyay squeak and rub against him. He didn't notice Horo looking at him with concern in his eyes, a hand against his forehead. He didn't notice anything that was being said to him.

When the vicious coughing bout subsided, Ren sat gasping, holding onto the closest thing (Horo's shoulders) with stiff arms.

Horo smiled sympathetically and rubbed Ren's back, care and worry making his stomach drop with fear for his friend. He gave the ill teenager a hot drink, helping him hold it in his shaking arms.

Ren finished his drink and started coughing again, stopping with a loud cough and a small moan of pain, before he clung to Horo, catching the Ice Shaman off guard.

After Ren had fallen asleep again, he noticed with a chuckle that it would be the third time in three days, three being 'Ren's number'.

Horo was propping Ren up a bit more with pillows and cushions when the doorbell went.

He glanced at the clock, 7am, and answered the door to find nobody there.

'_damn ding-dong-ditchers._' Horo thought, and was about to close the door when he heard a small cough. He glanced down and saw Manta, looking slightly peeved at not being noticed.

"Err… ohayo?"

"I came to see if you really were ill or if you were skipping school to get out of the plan. Looks like I'm losing that bet, ne?" Manta justified, glaring up at Horo.

"No, I'm not ill." Horo grinned sheepishly, "But I'm not skipping."

Manta raised an eyebrow.

"Honest! Look, you can come and _see _why Ren and I aren't at school."

Manta blinked, stepping inside.

"How did you know Ren was off school too?" he asked, taking off his small shoes and following Horo into the living room. Upon seeing who was bundled up on the couch, surrounded by old mugs, tissues and cough sweet wrappers, Manta gave an 'ohhhhhh' of understanding.

"You know how he is. He would've just gone to school, sick as a dog, and gotten worse." Horo explained, Manta nodding in understanding.

Manta left with an apologetic smile and a promise to let all of their teachers know.

-------------------------------------------------

Ren stared, almost unblinkingly, at the VCR clock on the other side of the coffee table. Horo had been in the shower for five minutes and fifteen seconds so far.

Ren rolled his eyes and removed himself from the sofa, strongly ignoring the way that the room swayed and the waves of nausea that accompanied it, he staggered into the kitchen and poured himself a large, cold glass of milk, which he proceeded to drink steadily.

When he had finished, he took his glass to the sink to wash it up, but soon found out that nearly every other plate Horo owned was piled inside, waiting to be washed.

Feeling slightly guilty for what he had made Horo do, Ren rolled his sleeves up and ran some water.

-------------------------------------------------

"What are you doing?"

Ren glanced towards the doorway to see Horo leaning against it with an eyebrow raised.

"You didn't expect me to leave your kitchen in such a state, did you? I know full well that you would never do these yourself anyway." Ren shrugged, turning back to the last few plates.

"Domo, Ren. But, you really didn't have to."

Ren mumbled something resembling a 'yeah, whatever' and Horo smiled, knowing this to be Ren's twisted way of thanking him.

-------------------------------------------------

**Woo!!!! I finally finished the chap n.n;**

**For being an ass at updating, I have put in a little preview :3**

"_Are you going to get that?"_

_Horo blinked, having drifted off slightly._

"_Huh?"  
"The phone. It's ringing. Are you going to get it?" Ren repeated, irritation clear in his voice._

_Horo rolled his eyes in a Ren-like fashion and picked the phone from the receiver._

_Ren, having nothing better to do, listened in on the conversation._

"_Hey! …Problem? What kind of--… you can't be serious… you are? Oh, God…"_

Ohayo Good Morning

Domo Thanks


	7. Sasu ga, Bocchama

**I'd usually write more in a chapter, but I'm posting what I have seeing as I haven't updated in like two months DX gomen ne, minna-san!!**

x - - - x

"Are you going to get that?"

Horo blinked, having drifted off slightly.

"Huh?"  
"The phone. It's ringing. Are you going to get it?" Ren repeated, irritation clear in his voice.

Horo rolled his eyes in a Ren-like fashion and picked the phone from the receiver.

Ren, having nothing better to do, listened in on the conversation.

"Hey! …Problem? What kind of--… you can't be serious… you are? Oh, Kamui…"

Ren looked at Horo, who was pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Okay. Thanks for the heads-up. Yeah, we will… Bye." Horo hung up, and let out a long breath.

"A 'Problem'?" Ren asked, an eyebrow raised, watching Horo walk back into the living room.

"Yeah." Horo flopped next to Ren on the couch, "Yoh doesn't believe that we're 'dating', so Manta managed to sneak away and warn us that Yoh's coming over after school." he explained, making full use of air-quotes.

Ren grimaced. It was enough that he was ill, let alone having to keep up that stupidly pointless charade.

"Don't act completely frigid like you did on Wednesday. It's no wonder that Yoh doesn't believe us if you're going to act like that." he snapped.

Horo rolled his eyes and muttered 'yes master', fully aware that Ren was just letting his frustration at being brought down by a cold out on him.

"…Horo?" Ren asked, his voice strangely quiet, "My throat's hurting again…"

Horo glanced over and noticed that Ren was looking at his empty glass. Horo grinned and scruffed Ren's hair playfully, before dodging a badly-aimed punch and taking the used glass back into the kitchen.

Horo chuckled, making a mental note for future teasing that Ren was having mood swings.

In the kitchen, Bason came through the wall and floated over to Horo.

"Bocchama says that if you don't hurry up with his drink, he'll put you in limbo."

Horo grimaced and nodded.

…

"Aren't you gonna go back in with 'Bocchama'?" Horo asked, noticing that the warlord hadn't moved.

"Err…" Bason started intelligently, "He will be fine on his own for a few minutes."

Horo gave a very Yoh-like laugh and agreed.

x - - - x

After Ren was drugged up on honey and lemon, Horo started making preparations for Yoh, who would no doubt be there any minute now.

"Okay, so when Yoh is at the door, I'm gonna be acting all surprised and shit and you can call out something clingy and sappy after a while."

Ren, obviously not even trying to focus, nodded dazedly.

"Awesome!" Horo grinned and gave Ren a thumbs-up.

After a few minutes, the doorbell went and Horo got up to answer it. He was about to call out 'I wonder who that is!',

"Don't act like a complete tit, Horo."

But, Ren obviously noticed the cunning smirk of his.

Ren rolled his sleepy eyes at Horo's withering glare and told him to hurry up and answer the damned door, as the insistent ringing was adding to his migraine.

Horo complied and Ren was left to snuggle further into the comfy, thick blankets that Horo still had him wrapped in, pretty sure that Kiyay had also entangled herself in them somewhere. The purring was a fair signal that this was true and that she didn't mind.

After a while, in the whiniest tone he could accomplish in his current state, Ren called out Horo's name.

Soon enough, Horo's head appeared in the doorframe, he smiled and said 'Yes Renny?' in a very housewife-like tone.

Ren mumbled something that he was sure included the words 'sofa' and 'cold' but Horo (and now Yoh) just stared at him blankly.

"Err… Bocchama said that the sofa was getting cold."

It was Ren's turn to blink, and somewhere inside Bason's 'vapour brain' (as Anna would put it) it clicked.

"It also seems like Bocchama is too tired to translate for himself." The warlord finished, Ren slowly nodding off.

Horo smiled sweetly and seated himself beside Ren, whom he let lean against him, and Yoh took the armchair that Horo himself had passed out on two nights before.

Ren unconsciously attached himself to Horo, who acted like he didn't mind it.

Yoh raised an eyebrow, and Horo remembered that his laid-back friend was amazing at observation, and realised that he himself probably looked tense. He relaxed and stated that Ren didn't usually do that, and that he was caught off guard to throw Yoh from the trail. Luckily, Yoh seemed to buy it.

Yoh stayed for a few hours, and Ren woke up at some point and apologised for his previous actions, and lied rather smoothly that Horo had simply worn him out. Yoh and Horo both laughed, though Horo's was more of a sheepish laugh and Yoh's was an 'I really didn't need to know that much' laugh. Horo shot a pleading look at Ren, who merely sent a devilish smirk back at Horo. Luckily, Yoh was distracted by a puffed, disorientated Kiyay emerging from the blanket arrangement.

The three of them spent the rest of the afternoon lazily watching reruns of Naruto and Fullmetal Alchemist, with Horo getting up once or twice to mix Ren some more honey and lemon.

Later in the evening, Ren was once again sleeping, but this time his head was in Horo's lap, and Yoh still occupied the armchair, with the addition of Kiyay on his knee.

Ren was sleeping more frequently, Horo explained, because of not only the toll of the illness on his body, but also because he was brought up only sleeping half the amount of time than what he should be each night. Add that to the intense training he does and all of the schoolwork, and Horo was surprised Ren had even lasted this long.

"Sasu ga, Bocchama. (1)" Yoh murmured, trying to lighten the suddenly depressing mood.

Yoh left shortly after, and Horo sat in the quiet, darkening room, lazily running his fingers through Ren's surprisingly soft hair. Ren had given up on his tongari the first day he was there, and simply had it tied at the base of his neck instead. Horo didn't hate the look, but he would always prefer the spiky, irritable shaman that had become his friend so long ago.

To be honest, the sleepy, vulnerable Ren was a first for anyone, and Horo was quickly embracing his role, knowing that Ren would prefer for everyone's perceptions of him to not be changed in any way, which was why Horo fed Yoh that bull crap.

Horo was also curious. He wanted to know why Ren had locked those emotions away, and why was he only now showing them, and why to Horo?

Had they all known the wrong Ren this whole time?

x - - - x

**-is shot- I know, I'm the worst updater EVER!!! BUT! I was distracted by the wonder that is Naruto Shippuuden, and people who author alert me will know that I've been writing that fic instead of this one ; sa, gomen ne!! If you read my profile bio thingy, you'll know that I'm trying to be better!**

**Maybe, if you reviewed me more, I'd update more, ne? xP**

**Anyway, seeing as Horo's thoughts weren't all that clear, I shall explain:**

**Renny is sick, so he cant hold up his emotional barriers any more, which is why he didnt want to be around horo at first, but now he doesnt seem to mind much, which piked Horo's curiosity. Yarr.**

**(1) In epsiode 30, japanese version, Yoh is marvelling over the size of America and Ren says that there are places in China where cars won't pass by for 33 days at a time, to which Bason replies "Sasu ga, Bocchama!" (subbed as "thats my young master! amazing!", but I think it's more along the lines of 'amazing, Bocchama!') and Horo replies 'whats so amazing?'. Later in the same ep, Ren says there are 33 places in China without people or animals, same reactions from Bason and Horo. A bit later (same ep), Horo makes a bad joke, to which Ren says 'thats not funny', so Horo takes the piss outta Bason and says 'sasu ga, bocchama' like Bason did. At the end of the episode, ren makes another 33 of this in China to which everyone says 'sasu ga, bocchama!!' seriously, go youtube the ep 3**

**You can all figure out the Japanese words with an online dictionary or something, as I'm lazy and tired.**

**Please Review.**


	8. Friends with Extras

**For those who didn't understand my shitty time setting idea, this is two years after the beginning of the manga, so Ren is 15 and most of the others are 16. I only have up to volume 7, so most other references are either from the dubbed or the subbed version of the anime, cos I'm cool like that xP**

**Also, in chapter six I had the line "Realising that if it carried on, he would miss school on Monday," when I had also said that Horo had forced Ren to stay home from school in that same chapter. Solution: Ren was kept home on the Friday, dumbshits! xD only kidding. But, that was what I had intended, and I'm pretty sure that most of you got it. If I had to guess, I'd say that the boyfriends thing was arranged on the Wednesday or the Thursday, but I'm not 100 percent sure, so yeah. I counted four days between my last chap and when Horo and Ren started 'dating', which means it was about three days between now and when Ren got sick, so Thursday is about right.**

x - - - x

Ren stepped into his apartment for the first time in days. It was now Sunday, and Horo had kindly taken Ren off of house arrest, seeing as Ren's cold was now only a sneeze every now and then.

Ren breathed in and coughed.

'_Jesus,' _he thought, '_The _air _is dusty!'_

After opening a few windows and letting the harsh winters breeze into his home, Ren set about cleaning the dust off of whatever it had collected upon, and getting ready for school the next day.

"Nine more days…" Ren murmured to himself. Nine more days and he wouldn't have to keep up this stupid _plan. _This game. Nine more days and he could go back to openly hating Horo, and sneering at the bluenette's every mistake.

He took extra care in packing his money and Rail Card. He'd be damned if he rode to school on Horo's snowboard again.

Ren looked around for Bason, but soon remembered that the Warlord had gone over to Monument Hill for some sort of spirit festival.

Now, with all of the dishes washed and dried and every surface cleaned three times over, Ren sat, alone, on his couch.

He wouldn't admit it… but his apartment seemed sort of… empty. Lonely, even. Which was odd, seeing as Ren was raised in solitude. It would have been funny if it didn't confuse him so much.

Maybe… he had gotten used to having someone around? Maybe, god forbid, he was craving human interaction?

Ren scowled and went off to train. What nonsense.

x - - - x

It was now the next day, a Monday, and Ren swayed on the spot stifling a yawn. He didn't know what time he had gotten to bed the night before, but he knew that Bason had been back long before whatever time he retired. His muscles ached, having never had four consecutive days off before being taken up a notch.

Even though the shaman tournament showed no signs of being continued, Ren still trained obsessively. He was like an anorexic, or a bulimic, except his obsession didn't involve food in any way.

He had to train.

If he didn't for a few days, he'd make it up. The only way to make it up and get the day's training on top of that was to work double time. So that was what he did.

The pain and occasional muscle twitches were simply punishment for being lazy.

Out of everything he could remember, training was the only thing that had ever remained constant. It was like a routine, if he didn't follow it to the letter then he'd fall into an unorganized chaos of a life.

A loud rattling shriek of worn breaks saved Ren from himself, causing him to blink in surprise, sigh and board the train.

'_Just in time, too.' _he thought. _'It's beginning to rain again…'_

"Right, I have an idea." Horo announced, sliding into the seat next to Ren.

Ren rolled his eyes. Horo had started getting Ren's train (but from a different stop) so that they could arrive to school together, making it seem as though they were together all night.

"Enlighten me, o Great One." he replied sarcastically, not taking his gaze from the rain-streaked landscape which was zooming past.

Horo ignored Ren's comment, but complied.

"I was thinking last night-" Ren had to bite back the urge to quip at this, "- And I realised that, yeah, we may have to _act _like boyfriends, but if we _think _we're boyfriends then we'd just end up acting all nervous and awkward."

…

"Your solution being?" Ren asked when it seemed Horo wasn't going to tell him.

"I didn't get that far."

Ren hit his head on the window.

Horo stood, their train coming to their stop.

"But, I guess we could just be… friends with extras." He held out his hand.

Ren looked at it for a few seconds before standing and taking the hand in his, intertwining their fingers.

"Friends," he confirmed, "Plus."

They smiled at each other and left the train, only to be confronted with what only can be described as chaos.

- - - +

"Okay," Horo panted, "What was _that?!"_

Ren wiped his mouth on his sleeve.

"That, Usui, is what is known as evasive action."

"Yeah but, you _kissed _me!"

"It distracted them!" Ren insisted.

"They still looked pretty intent on us, I'd say!" Horo snapped.

"Yes, but they were intent on _us, _not _killing _us. Or, to be more specific, _you._"

"Bastard." Horo mumbled, getting a slap on the cheek for his trouble.

"Are they gone yet?" Ren asked Bason, ignoring his 'boyfriend's whining.

The Warlord nodded. Well, he nodded as best he could considering that he was just a floating head.

Ren removed himself from their hiding place, the thoroughly thought out location of the Maths store cupboard, and dusted himself off. Horo followed Ren out and shut the door firmly behind him.

"Who would'a known that fangirls were that… _Rabid_…" he commented, stretching.

"You wait. There's probably already a Fan Base supporting our 'Forbidden Love' as they put it."

"Huh? 'As they put it'? All I heard was mass screamings of 'moe!!!' " Horo chuckled.

Overhead, the bell went, signalling the start of lessons that day.

Ren turned to Horo and smirked.

"Have fun in Food Tech, with all of my- I mean _our - _fangirls, Horo."

Horo groaned. He knew he should have picked English at the start of the year. There were no girls in that class. Well, no gossiping girls anyway.

Then he realised that that was the whole _reason _he didn't pick English and shrugged it off.

X - - - x

The day zoomed by, Horo and Ren continuously having to hide from the Ren-turned-Hororen fangirls and cursing the Asakuras in every way possible. Seriously. Ren was even caught ordering plagues of locusts to attack En Inn.

Horo breathed a sigh of relief after he entered the photography room. Wait, let me rephrase that. When he _dived into _the photography room, rolled under a desk and stayed there, unmoving, for close to five minutes.

Panic over, he bounded over to Ren and stole his camera, chirping that he'd take a picture and download it onto his USB in 3 minutes tops.

Quickly throwing together an impromptu composition of his matanpushi, ikupasui, snowboard and oracle pager, Horo snapped 5 pictures and quickly logged onto the nearest computer, speeding up considerably when he saw Ren staring at his watch, obviously counting 3 minutes to the millisecond.

He swiftly selected the pictures he took when one of Ren's old ones caught his eye.

Seeing his Chinese friend approaching, Horo just copied the entire folder and closed the window. Just in time too, as Ren wasted no time in ripping his memory card from the computer.

"Next time, bring your own freaking camera, _Ai._" he snapped, adding the last part when he saw Yoh watching the interaction intently.

Horo smiled and stood, leaning in to 'whisper in Ren's ear'.

"Boys!" their teacher clapped from across the room, "You know the rules! No drinking, eating or petting in the photography room!"

"How about groping?" Horo replied cheekily, slapping Ren's ass.

Ren, in return, squeaked (very macho) and hit Horo's arm (wow, even more macho!)

"Groping goes under petting, moron!" Ren snapped, flushing.

"And we all know who goes under Horo!" Someone piped in from the other side of the room, met with chuckles and Ren's blush deepening.

"I dunno, I'd do him." Someone else added, and Ren, having had enough, snatched his camera from Horo, his bag from his desk and whatever was left of his dignity and stormed out of the room.

X - - - x

Ren didn't return for the remainder of school, and after a bit of searching, the gang found him at the park, sat in a swing, infinite rain spilling onto his uncovered head.

They had all gathered around him, but none had been able to get him to speak. After a while, they all had one by one made their excuses and left, leaving just Horo as company. Horo knew that Ren wouldn't talk unless he wanted to, so he just picked up the thankfully waterproof camera, sat on the swing on Ren's right, and snapped away at the most random things.

"I thought I was over this…"

Horo looked over at Ren, lowering the camera from his dark eyes, waiting patiently for him to elaborate. And elaborate he did.

"I thought I was over… I… truly wanted to… kill them," he whispered, staring unblinkingly at the raindrops splashing in the puddles made by the uneven tarmac, "I wanted to torture each and every one of them until they screamed… until they begged for their lives… until they begged for their death…"

Horo's breath hitched. Ren hadn't ever spoken like this before, never this solemn. Never this bluntly honest. His shock went unnoticed as the Tao continued speaking,

"I… haven't wanted to kill in so, _so _long… Not since the tournament… not since my fight against Yoh… I'm… I'm scared Horo," Ren's knuckles turned white as his grip on the swing's chain increased and he bowed his head lower, Horo now unable to see Ren's horror-filled golden eyes, "I don't… _ever _want to kill again."

Horo reached over tentatively and placed a reassuring hand on his friend's shoulder.

Horo felt Ren's small shudders, and when Ren let out a tiny high pitched gasp, Horo knew that his usually headstrong, stubborn friend… was _crying._

Not knowing how to comfort Ren, Horo sat still, his hand feeling every quake and sob.

Horo set the camera on the ground with his spare hand before grasping Ren's cold hand in his own and slowly pulling the youngest Tao into his lap.

Like a child, Ren clung shamelessly to Horo and cried silently into his shoulder, the confused Ainu stroking his purple hair soothingly.

Ren soon quietened down, quick enough for Horo to wonder if he had fallen asleep.

He checked, and Ren was not asleep, but was instead staring at what seemed to be the fabric of Horo's coat, his eyes cold and emotionless. If they weren't bloodshot, Horo would wonder if what had just occurred was real or just his imagination.

"You won't." Horo stated, feeling suddenly awkward, "You won't kill again."

"How do you know?" Ren murmured with what seemed to be an air of helplessness and inevitability.

"You've changed, Ren. It might not seem like it, but you really have." Horo smiled. "And the fact that you're worried about it supports that. You wouldn't care if you truly wanted to kill, you'd just do it and not bat an eyelash."

Ren nodded and moved himself out of Horo's lap. He picked his camera up and wiped the water from it before settling it back in its case, which he dropped into his bag.

Later, at the train station, Ren requested that Horo not tell anyone about what had happened. Horo grinned widely and reassured him that he wouldn't ever bring it up unless Ren did.

Ren nodded in thanks, and they both went their separate ways home.

X - - - x

**Wows, I officially SUCK at updates XX;;;**

**Honto ni gomen nasai! DX I'd blame school, but half term started last Friday… -shifty eyes- so I'm gonna instead blame this on the evil that is also known as writer's block!!! I seriously only had about 500 words until tonight n.n;**

**I know I made Ren seem really weak and girly in this, but he's allowed to be –glare-**

**Moe – "mou-eh" you obviously haven't watched ouran koukou host club if you don't know what this one means. Basically, it means a nice feeling. Its like when you sit in a nice sofa and you sigh thinking 'holy crap, I'm stealing this sofa!'. In ouran, the crowd of girls screamed 'moe' when hikaru and kaoru gave displays of their forbidden brotherly love.**

**Matanpushi – ainu headband**

**Ikupasui – Ikupasi**

**Ultimatum time!**** If I don't get…. 8 reviews in a week, I'm switching back to my Naruto fic for a bit. 8 isnt even half of how many watchers there are, so if you want an update before September, review!**


	9. Bunsen Burners and PE Store Cupboards

Horo stared at the blank wall in front of him.

He couldn't for the _life_ of him figure out _what_ he had just heard.

Running over it in his mind, he nodded to himself. It was confusing… he'd have to talk to Ren.

But, first thing's first. How to get out of the cubicle without anyone, (as in; the Asakura twins), noticing that he'd been eavesdropping.

X - x - X

"Ren, I gotta talk to you!" Horo whispered, poking Ren's arm.

"If you like your hair the way it is, Usui, I suggest you don't poke me when I happen to be working over a frigging_ Bunsen burner!"_ Ren snapped, eyes not leaving the practical in front of him.

"Did you not get contacts yet, then?" Horo asked a few minutes later, when he noticed Ren squinting through his goggles.

Ren nodded curtly in affirmative. Horo sighed and rolled his eyes.

'At least the Groom's speech will be short.'

Horo's eyes widened.

'Okay, I did _not _just think that.'

…

'Who said he'd be the husband, anyway?'

-

Ren looked over at the sound of 'thunk'ing wood to notice his 'boyfriend' smacking his head repeatedly on the table.

Not caring enough to actually question Horo's behaviour, Ren turned back to his work.

Now that he thought about it, Horo had been acting like a complete retard all day. More so than usual, to be honest.

Another glance at Horo showed the Ainu slumped over the desk and staring into space.

Feeling suddenly daring, Ren smirked to himself and checked to see if anyone was looking.

A few fangirls and the stoned kid three rows in front, and not a teacher in sight.

Perfect.

-

"_Not. Cool._" Horo grumbled as he suddenly found himself on the floor with Ren sniggering down at him.

He wasn't totally sure, but he guessed Ren had pinched his ass or something. Whatever the Tao had done, Horo had flinched and knocked his own stool out of the way, sending him right onto the floor.

Horo grinned wickedly back up at Ren, before applying a well-aimed whack to the back of Ren's knees, making them buckle, and all he got for his trouble was a smack on the shoulder.

Recovering quickly, Horo leaned closer to Ren and wiggled his eyebrows suggestively.

"How about giving those fangirls something to squee about?"

-

"Ne," Pirika whispered to Manta, "They're getting a bit... into this, aren't they?"

Manta nodded. Both were staring at Horo and Ren, who seemed to be... making out on the floor behind them...

Manta shuddered and turned back to face the front, ignoring the fact that Pirika was still staring at the two.

"It's a bit creepy, na?" Yoh commented, laughing sheepishly.

"So, how long do you think it will take Horo?" Hao asked, joining the conversation.

Yoh shrugged, and so did Pirika.

"I didn't think bocchama would accept his role so quickly... Maybe you were right, Yoh-dono..."

Yoh grinned.

"I'm always right" he announced gleefully, not noticing the contradicting looks from his friends.

"Anyway," Manta sighed, "Time for the next phase, don't you think?"

X - x - X

"What _are_ you two doing?"

Yoh and Manta looked over at Hao, who had his eyebrow raised at them.

"Err..." Yoh answered, intelligently, hiding something behind his back.

"Do I have to stripsearch you again, otouto?"

Manta visibly shuddered at that, and produced a few polaroids from behind his own back and handed them to Hao.

'Too much information.' Hao grinned mentally, 'Works every time.' he stopped short, however, when he got a good look at the pictures.

"...How do you have polaroids of Horo and Ren making out?" he asked, calmly.

"Well, they make a good profit, the girls love them and-"

"I didn't ask why, I'm _all_ for selling them." Hao chuckled, "Seriously though, how did you get these shots? This one for instance," he held one up for them to see, "Is them making out in the PE store cupboard. You can only fit one person in there on a _good_ day."

All he got as a reply were two manic grins.

"...Forget I said anything..." Hao groaned, shaking his head.

X - x - X

When school ended for the day, Horo kissed Ren goodbye, as was customary, and hung around school to nag the Geography teachers into planting more trees.

He wasn't planning on being pinned to the wall by his throat, especially not by a very irate Asakura.

Oh well. Whatever it was, Horo was sure he could blame it on Pirika or Manta or somebody.

"I know about this ridiculous _plan _of yours, Ainu." Hao growled threateningly, "And I assure you, if you and your little boytoy try and get between me and my otouto," his grip increased significantly, "I'll _kill _you. _Both _of you."

Horo choked out something incomprehensible. Hao glared harder, before dropping Horo to the ground and stalking off before he could do so much as catch his breath. Only one thought echoed through his mind.

'Well_, shit_.'

**X - x - X**

**Yeaaah. I'm the worst at updating.**

**Thing was; my friends decided to put me on a yaoi ban until July (this was at the start of June) and though I gave up after a week and a half 8D i had major writer's block and all that jazz.**

**review?**


	10. Onigiri, Ramen or Baozi?

**Apologies for both the lack of updates and the fact that Kiyay's eye colour changes -.- the first I cant help, the second I am to lazy to pick through every chapter to find where they miraculously turned blue.**

**With that in mind, enjoy!**

**X – x - X**

Horo had been faced with a dilemma. And a tricky one, at that.

_"I know about this ridiculous _plan _of yours, Ainu." Hao growled threateningly, "And I assure you, if you and your little boytoy try and get between me and my otouto," his grip increased significantly, "I'll __kill __you. _Both _of you."_

Horo glared at the Hao in one of their group photos that he'd lazily tacked to the wall months previously. It wasn't Horo's fault that Manta and Anna had to teach Yoh a lesson. It wasn't Horo's fault that Manta and Anna couldn't just confront Yoh about it. And it damn well wasn't Horo's fault that he'd been dragged into it, let alone shared spit with the last person on earth he'd ever want to because of it!

Horo had three possible options and four possible consequences. Seeing as Horo had no doubt about Hao being able to kill them both, this was swiftly decreased to two possible consequences.

Scenario One: Horo doesn't tell Ren and they continue with the plan.

Consequence One: They both die.

Scenario Two: Horo tells Ren and they still continue with the plan.

Consequence Two: see Consequence One.

Scenario Three: Horo tells Ren and they drop the plan.

Consequence Three: They live.

Even a complete idiot, like Horo, could see that the most appealing course of action was the third choice.

Horo however, being not only a complete idiot but also amazingly stubborn, would not follow the unwritten rule of 'you tell your boyfriend everything,' and would instead try and resolve the situation on his own.

You see, Horo was MALE like that.

Horo was not going to back down, and decided to show the world this the very next morning by grabbing Ren by the shoulders and crashing their mouths together, in plain sight of Hao and his following of cheerleaders.

The only thing he had to show for it was a bruising shoulder and Hao's furious glare.

Horo blinked a few times. Kissing Ren had left his head a bit fuzzy, but he ignored it and muttered 'too early in the morning' as an excuse.

It's not like he was starting to like Ren or anything.

…Right?

X – x – X

Ren poked unenthusiastically at his onigiri and sighed.

What he wouldn't give for just ONE baozi.

-

_Horo slammed his fist on the table with a snarl._

"_Every day it's Chinese, Chinese and even more Chinese!!" he yelled over at Ren, who was calmly munching on a baozi, "Enough already!!"_

_Ren 'hmph'ed. "Whatever. It's your fault for being unlucky in addition of being weak."_

_Horo ripped up the line game they'd played to decide who chose lunch with an almighty screech of "IT WAS RIGGED!"_

"_Idiot. It was you who drew those lines, wasn't it?" Ren argued, still without even looking up._

_Horo faltered._

"_Er, well let's not go into details," he mumbled, before screaming "The point is that you are always too damn selfish!"_

_-_

'_Maybe I was being a bit selfish back then…'_ Ren pondered, settling for chewing on his chopsticks. He finally understood why Horo and Choco had been so annoyed at always having to eat the same thing.

'_Oh well,' _he sighed, _'It isn't my fault that the lazy bastards didn't want to pay for their own meals.'_

Ren glared at Yoh, who had spent the last twenty seconds waving a hand in Ren's face.

"What?" he snapped.

"Just wanted to point out that you are allowed to eat at your food, you don't have to just stare at it with a hungry look." Yoh grinned and dodged Ren's fist.

"If you hate it that much, don't eat it." Manta advised.

Yoh nodded seriously. "Feed those of us that forgot our money!"

Ren scowled and pushed his tray over to Yoh, who gave a girly squeak and started to gobble the nearly untouched meal.

"Where are Horo and Hao?" Manta wondered aloud, purposefully ignoring Yoh, who was making noises and spraying rice around not unlike a food processor without a lid.

"Horo's been acting weird around Hao all day," Yoh commented after a loud swallow, "Do you think they're up to something?"

Manta shrugged and glanced at Ren, who had his eyes shut and his arms folded, and would have looked like he was asleep to anyone who didn't know him.

"Oh well. Hao's a big boy; he can take care of himself." Yoh sighed, clapping his hands together and chirping 'gochisousama'.

"Here he is!" Manta grinned. "We were wondering what you were up to and whether Horo was in on it."

Hao smiled serenely. "I was running an… errand. As for Horo, I have no idea where he could be."

Ren suppressed a shudder and left the table.

Hao was getting creepier and creepier by the day, and the way he had just said 'Horo' reminded Ren of the days when he said 'chiccheana', and he had a bad feeling about it.

To his relief, he found Horo lying unharmed under one of the sakura trees that were dotted over the school field.

The Ainu had his head resting on his upturned palms and his legs were bent at the knee. His eyes were closed and he was smiling softly.

Ren resisted the urge to smile too and turned to leave, drawing his coat tighter around himself.

"Where're you going?"

Ren looked down to see that Horo was not sat up and patting the space beside him.

Ren raised an eyebrow.

"You can see the moon today. And if you look hard enough, you can see the stars already too."

Ren stared at Horo before sighing in exasperation and sitting down on the offered patch of grass, muttering 'you really are a fanciful bastard,' before staring boredly at the sky.

'_How about that,'_ he thought with slight disbelief, _'You really can see the stars.'_

His thoughts were broken by a giggle from Horo's general direction.

"What?" he snapped for the second time that day.

"You got some sakura in your hair." Horo chuckled, reaching up and brushing it away.

Then, it happened. Their gazes interlocked and time froze around them.

Ren's stare flicked to Horo's mouth when the other's tongue darted out to wet his lips.

Ren swallowed and leaned in, pressing a soft kiss to them before leaning back, shock evident on his usually set expression.

"Horo, I—"

"Don't," Horo murmured, drawing nearer, "Don't apologise."

Ren nodded once, slow and controlled enough to have been missed easily.

Horo licked his lips again and reached up with his free hand, using it to dip Ren's head down enough for another soft kiss, their eyes sliding shut in unison.

Ren released a breath he didn't know he was holding and relaxed slightly, increasing his pressure against Horo, a shiver running down his spine as the other's fingers lost themselves in his hair.

They parted for oxygen and Horo flopped back onto the grass.

"That was niiiice." He sighed.

Ren touched his still tingling lips and stayed silent for a few seconds, before humming in agreement.

They both looked over at the school building when they heard the bell ringing. Then they looked back at each other.

Horo smiled and winked.

"I say we get outta here."

Ren blinked slowly before returning the smile and giving another soft nod.

X – x – X

Horo fell into his apartment, giggling madly.

"Their _faces!!_" Horo was gushing, "And when you told him to--, and then he looked at us like," Horo was having trouble holding himself up, "I can't believe they threw us out!"

Ren rolled his eyes. "It wasn't that funny, Ainu-baka." He insisted, though a spark of amusement played across his golden irises and a smirk tugged at his features.

"I can't believe you tried to use your kwan-dao for a whack-a-mole game!" Horo continued as if the other had not been heard.

"Tsk. That mallet couldn't have swatted a fly."

"But you used your _kwan-dao!_"

"There was no rule saying I couldn't."

"But you—mmfph!" Horo tried to retaliate before Ren covered Horo's mouth with his own.

They parted with a soft 'smack' sound and Ren murmured a quiet 'let it go', and Horo nodded giddily.

"Now let's eat something before your stomach makes itself known."

Horo nodded vigorously and bounced into his kitchen as Ren leaned against the door frame idly.

"Right, I have ramen, pocky and some really old packs of wotsits." Horo said, before shuddering and pulling out two cups of ramen, "Up for ramen?"

Ren hesitated, but shrugged.

Three minutes and thirty seconds (Horo had trouble getting the lids off) later, they were both sat on Horo's sofa, steaming cups of miso ramen in their hands.

Ren stared distastefully at Horo, who was shovelling the noodley treat into his mouth before they had even sat down.

In a way that mirrored what he did at lunch, he merely poked at the ramen with his chopsticks, yearning for something other than Japanese food for a change. He sighed inwardly and started eating the cheap, plastic-tasting dinner however, because he knew Horo'd whinge about slaving over a hot kettle to bring him his food and all he did was turn his nose up at it.

Horo finished in less time than it took him to cook the ramen and bored quickly, too lazy to reach for the remote and flick the TV on.

This meant that Horo was just going to sit and fidget with anything he could find.

Unfortunately for Ren, he was the closest thing at hand.

"Why is your school shirt all the way up?" Horo asked 'innocently', reaching towards Ren to unbutton said shirt a bit.

"Because I want it to be." Ren snapped, waving Horo's hand away with his chopsticks.

"Why do you want it to be? You wanna look like a geek, Renny?"

"I thought you said I looked hot in my glasses?" he replied, smirking.

Horo paused, before grinning.

"You'd look hotter with that shirt unbuttoned!" Horo argued gleefully, finally having one-upped Ren.

"That was a little forward, even for you." Ren muttered icily, his eyebrow twitching slightly.

"Ren, Ren, Ren." Horo sighed, "You haven't _seen _forward. Seriously, my _dad _flirts with me more than that!"

Ren had a horrible vision of En trying to rip his shirt off and shuddered.

"Aheh," Horo chuckled, rubbing the back of his head, "You didn't just think of Hige doing what I think you were thinking of him doing, were you?"

Ren glared at him. Horo cringed. Ren slammed his nearly full ramen cup on the table.

"I'm leaving. That ramen tastes like paper." he announced haughtily, "And I hope you haven't given the rest of my family ridiculous nicknames."

Horo rolled his eyes.

"Yes Ren, we have the moustache, the necrophiliac, the philosopher, the wife and the cone-head. Are there any more relations of yours that I can insult as a—JESUS!" Horo screeched, clutching a hand to his face, "Dude! It was a _joke!_ Y'know, funny? Or do they not have that over in Kishuu?" Horo snapped, his patience worn.

"At least Kishuu isn't so frozen that people can't be born with brains anymore!" was shouted from the front door where Ren was pulling his coat and boots back on, "Humour is a form of entertainment, not a form of insult!"

"Oh yeah? This coming from the person who found it fun and _entertaining _to kill people!"

Ren's eyes widened, along with Horo's.

"Shit, Ren I didn't mean--"

"Save it." Ren spat, slamming the door on his way out.

**X – x – X**

**Yaaay I updated n.n**

**I also managed to get Ren and Horo properly together and split them up again in under 2,000 words XD go me!**

**Hige – **Short for Kuchihige, which means moustache. In episodes 23 and 24, Horo calls En 'hige' (you can all guess why), saying things like;

Yoh: He (En) kind of looks normal!

Horo: But, moustache. ("Demo, hige")

Also on one instance, I caught Horo flipping him off, which I found quite hilarious, though it might have just been my overactive brain.

The quote with them choosing what to eat for lunch was ……… between 41 and 51, I know that much n.n; I can't remember which one, but it's the one where Ryu meets that Arabian woman and her 'deer'

The 'fanciful bastard' is a quote from another episode, I think 22 or 23, when Yoh gets Ren out of the dungeon (again, I _think_ its that one n.n;;;;)

**Baozi **– pork bun! (or something like it ... a meat-filled dumpling, i think it was described)

**Review?**


	11. Ugly Mug

Ren sighed boredly.

It had been five days since their argument.

On the first day, Horo tried to apologise but was ignored.

On the second day, Horo didn't say anything to Ren, but acted kindly towards him still.

On the third day, Horo didn't show up for school.

Neither did he on the fourth day, or on the fifth day, and the fact had been keeping Ren slightly on edge, not to mention _bored out of his mind._

Weird, thirteen years of his life spent in solitude crumbled at a year and a half of exposure to idiots. He'd just have to train a little more often, that's all.

So here he was, on another school day, and there was still NO SIGN of Horo.

Which, to be honest, was BAD as tomorrow they were supposed to conduct the main phase of the plan, and without Horo, the entire thing was completely redundant.

And it wasn't like Horo was at his apartment. On the contrary, Ren had gone over to Horo's at the end of day 3, let himself in (wink, wink), seen that nobody was home and took it upon himself to feed the poor kitten until the ice shaman returned from wherever-the-fuck he was.

He tapped his fingernails against the hard wood of his desk irritably.

It's not like he was worried. Because Taos do not care about other people, let alone worry about them.

But he couldn't extinguish the niggling feeling in the back of his mind; in the pit of his stomach.

In other words, he knew Horo had probably gone snowboarding without Kororo again, fallen off of a cliff and was resting at the park ranger's hut.

Ahh, memories.

Their teacher left the room, probably to get worksheets or some shit like that, and Ren was instantly pounced on by three of the "HoroRen fangirls".

Unfortunately for Ren, the Glare of Your Doom proved ineffective, the girls ignoring it completely to ask him of Horo's whereabouts.

"Why should I know?" he asked in response, not bothering to hide the tick his eye seemed to have developed.

One of the girls rolled her eyes as if it was the most obvious thing in the world before answering smoothly with a "Be_cause, _you're his _boyfriend!"._

Ren didn't take this to heart. They probably used a similar excuse for forgetting homework or birthdays. He looked away, instead scowling at the window frame.

"Hey! Sorry I'm late!"

Ren's head snapped back to the front, where Horo was waltzing in as if he'd never been absent. A vein in Ren's forehead popped in anger and he resisted the urge to throw his chair at the ice shaman, glaring back out the window.

Unfortunately, his patience could only last so long.

"Ren, you're seriously hurting Horo!" Yoh exclaimed at lunch, trying to hold the Chinese teenager back, "I know you missed him, but _jeez!" _

Ren calmed down suddenly. "Che. It's not my fault that one look at his ugly mug makes me want to beat it in." he snapped, flicking his head off to the side.

"Aw, Renny missed me!" Horo cheered as if he hadn't even heard the comment. Ren growled and stormed off.

X o X o X

"Hey, Ren! Dude, wait up!"

Ren's eye twitched fiercely and he sped up, trying to put distance between himself and the idiot.

"Ren!"

Not long now… maybe he could push Horo off of the train…

"_Ren! _I said I was sorry, dude!"

"NO," Ren whirled around, jabbing a finger into Horo's chest, "You _never _said sorry, Ice-brain! You never bloody said ANYTHING-"

"Ow, Ren, you're poking me really hard..."

"-AND not ONLY did you not say ANYTHING to _me _or to _Yoh _or to _anyone-"_

"Seriously Ren, I can feel the bruise forming…"

"-You ALSO left your poor cat to STARVE!"

Horo's face blanked.

"Shit, I knew I forgot somethi—"

BANG!

"Ahh, DUDE! INTO THE BUS SHELTER?!"

Ren forced himself to not pummel Horo to death any more than he already had and turned around, heading for the train.

"Okay," Horo gasped when he finally caught up, "You win, I'm _sorry._"

Ren paused.

"If you were sorry… you wouldn't have worried me like that…" he mumbled inaudibly, his bangs covering his eyes, "You're such an inconsiderate bastard, Horo."

Horo couldn't help but grin. He walked around so he was in front of the smaller teenager and leaned in slightly.

"So… does this mean you missed me?"

Ren glared up at him, but found himself unable to answer.

The fact that Horo had just decided to use his mouth for better things had nothing to do with it, either.

Ren sighed and wrapped his arms around Horo's neck, tiptoeing slightly and leaning into the kiss hungrily.

Someone pushed them in their rush to get to the train and they broke apart, flustered, and looked away from each other in embarrassment.

"Am I forgiven?" Horo asked suddenly, a cheeky grin spread over his features.

Ren scoffed.

"Hardly."

**X o X o X**

**I am well aware this is utter crap, but you people seriously need to come at me with pitchforks if you want me to update!! Actually don't…**

**I'm not really in a HoroRen fandom right now, and I'm halfway through writing a multichap KuroFai (Tsubasa Chronicle) fanfic. So if any of you like KuroFai too, come check it out in a … month or two XD infact, come check it out in a month or two anyway, KuroFai is a similar relationship to HoroRen (in my POV it is anyway).**

**If you haven't read Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle, I hugely suggest you get yourself onto One Manga dot Com and read it, it's fucking AWESOME. **

**I shit you not :)**

**Also, this chapter puts Ignorance Is Bliss on Hiatus. I'm sorry, but as you've seen, this is going nowhere fast.**


End file.
